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by Abigail Van Buren

Homeless People Are More in Need Than Homeless Pets

DEAR ABBY: I have decided to end our marriage. The reason for our divorce is my wife's marital indiscretions. We are well known in town, and our family and close friends were utterly shocked when they heard the news.

My problem: I do not want anyone thinking that I have been a less-than-decent, caring husband and father. There was no wrongdoing on my part. My wife, although appearing to be a very decent, moral woman, chose to ignore her vows to "forsake all others," if you get my drift -- and I think you do.

I do not wish publicly to slander her, but mutual friends are treating me somewhat coldly because I initiated the divorce.

At the present time, I am not speaking to my wife, which is perceived as being cruel; however, I feel that this is appropriate in light of her indiscretions.

So, should I remain silent and try to ignore my friends' cold shoulders? -- MR. X

DEAR MR. X: Whether you want to speak to your wife is your own business, but for you to "let people know" that she violated her marriage vows will make you look like a cad. It is almost impossible to throw dirt on someone without getting a little on yourself.