DEAR ABBY: When you get an invitation to a wedding and you can't go, are you obligated to tell them why?
I received an invitation to a church wedding that is scheduled for 10:30 in the morning. It's a good four-hour drive from where I live, and that's too long a drive and it's too early.
Also, if you get money from relatives as a gift, are you supposed to tell them what you bought, or did, with the money? -- PERPLEXED IN TUCSON
DEAR PERPLEXED: It is not necessary to state why you are unable to accept an invitation to a wedding -- or to any other affair -- but it softens the turndown if you can truthfully say that you are unable to attend due to a previous commitment or that you will not be in town.
When you receive a gift of money, you are not obligated to disclose how the money was used.