"How to Be Popular" is an excellent guide to becoming a better conversationalist and a more attractive person. To order, send a long, business-size, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $3.95 ($4.50 in Canada) to: Dear Abby, Popularity Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, Ill. 61054. (Postage is included.)
Smokeout Clears the Way for Smokers Hoping to Quit
DEAR ABBY: In 1990, you gave the nation's smokers a wonderful gift the week before Thanksgiving: a column encouraging them to participate in the American Cancer Society's Great American Smokeout.
Your support helped millions across the country make the decision to quit smoking, at least for the day. Your column was a terrific morale-booster for our 2.5 million American Cancer Society volunteers in the United States.
Would you please run that lovely Smokeout column again? And thank you for your continued help in the fight against cancer. -- LINDA S. HAASE, ASSOCIATE DIRECTOR OF COMMUNICATIONS, AMERICAN CANCER SOCIETY, ILLINOIS DIVISION
DEAR MS. HAASE: With pleasure!
DEAR READERS: Tomorrow, Nov. 21, 1991, will mark the 15th Annual Great American Smokeout, a one-day campaign to encourage smokers to quit smoking for 24 hours, just to prove they can do it.
Last year, 19 million smokers tried to quit for the day. This represents 38 percent of the nation's 50 million smokers. Breast cancer used to be the biggest killer for women. But the No. 1 cause of cancer death among women and men today is lung cancer. Tobacco claims one life every 13 seconds. An estimated 143,000 will die of lung cancer in 1991.
And now, a word about smoking-related diseases -- emphysema, chronic bronchitis and heart disease: This year an estimated 434,000 will die from one of these. This total exceeds the number of U.S. battle deaths in World War II -- nine times as many people who die in automobile accidents every year.
A congressional study has reported that health costs from the adverse effects of smoking have reached a new high of $100 billion a year in increased medical bills and lost productivity. The loss in death and disability cannot be measured.
What about "secondhand" smoke? Is it damaging to non-smokers to be in the presence of those of you who are smoking? Yes! One non-smoker dies of secondhand smoke for every eight smokers. And studies reveal that the children of smokers are more prone to lung problems and allergies than are children of non-smokers.
For years I have begged my young readers, "If you smoke, quit now. If you don't smoke, don't start!" Yet an estimated 3,000 to 5,000 kids light up for the first time every day. Why? Peer pressure, no doubt. Cigarette companies sell $1 billion of cigarettes to children each year.
Quitting "cold turkey" is the hardest way to quit, but my readers tell me it's the most effective, and in the long run, the easiest. Those who need help to break their habit: Call your local chapter of the American Cancer Society or call (800) 227-2345 for information.
If you're hooked, and have been telling yourself, "One of these days I'm going to quit," why not start tomorrow? It won't be easy -- but it will be the best Thanksgiving present you can give yourself -- and those who love you. -- Love, Abby
DEAR ABBY: After reading the letter you printed concerning all the wonderful benefits of hugging, I had to write to express a contrary opinion.
Except for my husband, small children and animals, I am a person who does not like to be touched, and I think I have the right to feel that way. There is nothing wrong with me, and I am sure there are others who share my feelings.
Granted, a great many people feel that a hug can make their day, but a hug can ruin mine. Occasionally someone I know only casually will hug and even kiss me, when I have given them absolutely no reason to believe I would welcome such familiarity. Not wanting to appear rude, I grimace and bear it.
I don't know how this problem can be resolved, since apparently most people don't object. But how is one supposed to know in advance that someone does not want to be hugged? However, once I inform a person that I don't like to be touched, I would hope that my wishes will be respected.
I have even thought of wearing a T-shirt with "Thank you for not hugging me" across the front. Any suggestions?
Just sign me ... HANDS OFF
DEAR HANDS OFF: Lest you believe you are alone in your aversion to being touched, let me assure you that you are not. When a known hugger approaches you, immediately offer your hand, inviting the hugger to accept a firm handshake. Your body language will signal that that's about as close you care to get. There is nothing rude about setting limits.
DEAR ABBY: My co-workers and I are ticket takers at a large annual event. All too often, people, for a number of reasons, put their ticket in their mouth to free up both hands in order to put change in their wallets or to hold a youngster's hand -- or whatever.
They do not consider that when they remove the ticket from their mouth, they grasp the nice clean end, while we, the ticket takers, must handle the wet and unsanitary portion.
This is a rather disgusting procedure. Oddly enough, the majority of offenders are clean and courteous people who would ordinarily be careful of their personal hygiene, and have respect for the health and feelings of others.
We are expected to be friendly and gracious, but how can we handle this without offending anyone?
Perhaps a word in your column would send a message to those who are unwittingly guilty of this offensive habit. It would make work a little more pleasant for those who handle tickets for public events. I hope this is column-worthy. -- A TOUCHY TICKET TAKER
DEAR TOUCHY: Just when I think I've heard everything, along comes a letter like yours. Is it column-worthy? You bet.
DEAR ABBY: Most of us lick postage stamps. Are they sanitary? How about envelopes? -- HENRY LOBLE, HELENA, MONT.
DEAR HENRY: Maybe yes, maybe no. But since you are concerned, use a damp sponge to moisten postage stamps as well as the flap of the envelope, and you won't have to worry about whether they're sanitary.
What teen-agers need to know about sex, drugs, AIDS, and getting along with their peers and parents is now in Abby's updated, expanded booklet, "What Every Teen Should Know." To order, send a long, business-size, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $3.95 ($4.50 in Canada) to: Dear Abby, Teen Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, Ill. 61054. (Postage is included.)
Birds in the Bush Are Safer Than Birds in Some Hands
DEAR ABBY: Bless you for your humanitarian objection to the traditional Labor Day Pigeon Shoot in Hegins, Pa.
I happen to be a bird lover, and it may please you to know that I wrote to you in 1961 on the subject of cruelty to birds. You printed my letter and I still have the clipping. I am enclosing a copy. You may want to print it again. -- STILL A BIRD LOVER AT AGE 89
DEAR BIRD LOVER: It's a wonderful letter, and I certainly do want to print it again. Here it is:
DEAR ABBY: Will you please say something about people who buy birds as pets, and then mistreat them? I have actually had people say to me, "Our canary fell into the dishwater and was drowned." Or, "Our parakeet flew into the open fireplace and got burned up." Or, "The cat got it." Or, "The dog got it."
I once knew a man who used to give his parakeet vodka just to see how it would act. This same man is big and strong, and just because the bird pecked him on the ear, he knocked the bird down and broke its wing!
What a pity that birds are the most abused of all pets. -- BIRD LOVER
DEAR BIRD LOVER: Not all pet birds are abused -- only those who are unfortunate enough to belong to people who belong in cages.
DEAR ABBY: Will you please say something to older women who work at fast-food places and take jobs from us teen-agers?
There's one who works here, and she's so goody-goody -- always on time, and she never goofs off. I don't think she really needs the money.
She must be 50 years old -- at least. -- A TEEN, CENTERVILLE, IOWA
DEAR TEEN: I doubt very much that a 50-year-old woman would be working at a fast-food place unless she really needed the money. It's possible that if it weren't for that job, she would be on welfare. If she's always on time and never goofs off, I'd say she's setting a fine example for the other employees. Give her a break.
DEAR ABBY: I couldn't resist sharing this old story when I read about the plate-licking dog:
The preacher was invited to Sunday dinner by a church member. When he was called to the table, he noticed that it was set with the dirtiest dishes he had ever seen.
He asked his hostess: "Are these dishes clean?" She replied, "They're as clean as soap and water could get them." He then reluctantly blessed the food and began eating. The food was delicious, so he praised the hostess in spite of the dirty dishes.
When she cleared the table, she took the dishes to the back door and hollered, "Here Soap! Here Water!" -- DOG LOVER IN ABILENE, TEXAS
Everybody has a problem. What's yours? Get it off your chest by writing to: Dear Abby, P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, Calif. 90069. For a personal reply, please enclose a stamped, self-addressed envelope.