Everything you'll need to know about planning a wedding can be found in Abby's booklet, "How to Have a Lovely Wedding." To order, send a long, business-size, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $3.95 ($4.50 in Canada) to: Dear Abby, Wedding Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, Ill. 61054. (Postage is included.)
DEAR ABBY: When I read the letter in your column from the pizza delivery truck driver, I had to write. I also work for a national pizza chain, as an inside person taking telephone orders. (Our goal is to take the order, make the pizza and deliver it within 30 minutes.)
The same parents who allow 3- and 4-year-olds to pay for the pizzas also put them on the phone to order them. I have to keep four adults on hold while trying to decipher the speech of a toddler. Meanwhile, the parents are in the background coaching him or her as to what to order, the address, etc. These parents obviously think this performance is incredibly cute. I have also had 5- and 6-year-olds placing orders as late as 10 and 11 p.m.
Abby, please allow me to point out a few tips for readers who order pizza:
1. Decide what you want to order before you call. We may have people on hold while you are conferring with each other as to what size to order, what toppings, etc.
2. Have the person who knows the address order the pizza.
3. Have your money ready for the driver, since he may have several pizzas to deliver within 30 minutes.
4. Please be on the lookout for your pizza once it's ordered. Turn on a light so your address is visible at night. Have an adult present to pay for the pizza. Also, lock up your Doberman, pit bull terrier, German shepherd, etc.
Thanks, Abby. This is a load off my chest. -- ELAINE IN BALTIMORE
DEAR ELAINE: Grazie for the suggestions.
DEAR ABBY: I was happy to see that piece in your column warning your readers about bringing valuables (jewelry) when they check into a hospital -- even for an overnight stay.
I've been an RN for 12 years and I am still amazed at the stuff people lug into a hospital.
Some come in with loads of suitcases for a week's stay. One woman brought all her diamonds and hid them in a pillowcase -- which almost got thrown in a hamper!
Only last month, a man brought his life's savings of $100,000 in cash! Luckily, an observant employee spotted the stash and called security to place it in the vault for safekeeping.
Elderly and confused patients are most vulnerable. I have seen patients throw wedding rings and hearing aids in the trash cans.
Yes, there are thieves even in hospitals, but it's impossible for us to search every man, woman and child that comes and goes here.
Please print this, Abby. No city, please. -- ROSE, AN R.N.
Cost of Vietnam War Was High in Lives and Dollars
DEAR ABBY: While cleaning out my garage, I found a P.O.W. bracelet in a small box. On the bracelet was engraved "LCDR JOHN McKAMEY: 6-2-65" -- and then a tiny white star.
If you can locate this man's family, I would be happy to send this bracelet to them. I was very young when the Vietnam War took place and know very little about it. Why was it started? And exactly what was accomplished? They don't teach much about it in school, and those who served in Vietnam seem reluctant to talk about it. -- KAREN A. TAMURA, CERRITOS, CALIF.
DEAR KAREN: The Vietnam War was the longest war in which the United States took part. It began in 1957 and ended in 1975.
About 58,000 American men and women died in that war, and approximately 365,000 were wounded. South Vietnamese deaths topped 1 million, and North Vietnamese losses ranged between 500,000 and 1 million men, women and children.
In terms of money, the war cost the United States more than $150 billion. According to the World Book Encyclopedia:
On Aug. 4, 1964, President Lyndon Johnson announced that the U.S. destroyers Maddox and C. Turner Joy had been attacked in the Gulf of Tonkin, off the coast of North Vietnam. (Some Americans doubted that the attack had even occurred -- it has never been confirmed.) President Johnson then asked Congress for power to take all necessary measures to repel an armed attack against the forces of the United States and to prevent further aggression. The war soon became an international conflict. Joining the U.S.A. were Australia, South Korea, New Zealand, Thailand and the Philippines.
On May 4, 1970, U.S. National Guard units fired into a group of peaceful anti-war demonstrators at Kent State University in Kent, Ohio -- killing four students and wounding nine others. Small wonder nobody wants to talk about it; it was not our proudest hour. Soon afterward, the Senate voted to repeal the Gulf of Tonkin Resolution.
The war ended when South Vietnam surrendered to North Vietnam in Saigon (now called Ho Chi Minh City) on April 30, 1975.
Those who are interested in locating other former prisoners of war may write to: The Assistant Secretary of Defense of Internal Security Affairs; Attn: Principal Adviser POW/MIA Affairs, Washington, D.C. 20301-3407.
DEAR ABBY: About that lady in Levittown who told her husband to take a cold shower to take off weight: Maybe she's onto something revolutionary! Somewhere in the dim past, I got it into my head that when the body gets too cold, the hypothalamus kicks in, and in order to maintain a normal body temperature, it starts the body into a fat-burning program. I also think that people living in the Arctic eat a diet that is high in calories for the same reason.
Wow! Let your imagination go. Why not build a five-acre fat farm that is nothing more than a gigantic walk-in refrigerator? Holy smoke ... shiver yourself skinny! -- R.M. MORELL, M.D., SUN CITY, ARIZ.
DEAR DOCTOR: If you are right, more than half of America will love you, but a five-acre refrigerator would not be big enough to accommodate the grateful masses. So, it's back to exercise -- aerobics and pushing away from the table.
Most teen-agers do not know the facts about drugs, AIDS, and how to prevent unwanted pregnancy. It's all in Abby's updated, expanded booklet, "What Every Teen Should Know." To order, send a business-size, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $3.95 ($4.50 in Canada) to: Dear Abby, Teen Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, Ill. 61054. (Postage is included.)
Parents Can Breathe Easier With Swimming Pools Fenced
DEAR ABBY: I read with interest the letter from Amanda's mother, who was concerned for Amanda's safety when visiting grandparents who have an unfenced swimming pool. She said she realized that a fence is expensive, and asked how she could let her in-laws know how important a fence is to save the life of a child.
The U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission is very concerned about child drownings. In 1987, more than 300 children under the age of 5 drowned in residential swimming pools and spas. This does not even count the thousands who survived near-drowning, some with permanent brain damage.
I certainly agree with everything you said in your reply. There is no substitute for constant adult supervision. Pool owners should learn cardiopulmonary resuscitation (CPR) to be prepared just in case. We would like to add our recommendation for a fence at least 4 feet high with a self-closing and self-latching gate. This is an important additional layer of protection.
Drownings happen quickly -- a child can drown in less than 3 minutes -- and more often than not the child is unable to cry out for help. Fencing the pool is a valuable extra measure pool owners can take to deter a child's access to the water.
We offer to your readers our free brochure, "Children and Pools: A Safety Checklist." Send your request on a postcard to: Pool Safety Checklist, U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission, Washington, D.C. 20207. -- CAROL G. DAWSON, COMMISSIONER, CONSUMER PRODUCT SAFETY COMMISSION
DEAR ABBY: I just read the letter from "Andy's Mother" who was disappointed in her son because he wanted to do manual labor and work with his hands instead of getting a college education.
Abby, my husband is 26 years old and has been a bricklayer for nearly seven years, and he is far from stupid. He not only lays bricks, he is sometimes the foreman and has to read blueprints for large buildings.
I wonder how many men Andy's mother knows who make $45,000 a year without a college education.
My husband works 40 hours a week, and I am able to stay home and take care of our own children. I know a lot of "professional" people who put their children in day care because one income is not enough to raise a family.
I'm proud of my husband. He may work with his hands, but he also has to work with his head or he wouldn't know what to do with his hands. If it weren't for people like my husband, we would all be living in tents with no electricity or plumbing. -- A MASON'S WIFE IN HARTFORD, CONN.
DEAR MASON'S WIFE: The mail was heavy on this subject. A Waco, Texas, reader wrote in to say that he worked with his hands, but he also had eight years of college. He was a dentist.
Everybody has a problem. What's yours? Get it off your chest by writing to: Dear Abby, P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, Calif. 90069. For a personal reply, please enclose a stamped, self-addressed envelope.