Ask Someone Else's Mom by Susan Writer

What Does He Call New In-Laws?

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: I was only dating my new wife for a short time before we got married. Her sister and her husband were, I think, high school sweethearts, so they were together for nearly five years when they got married. They call my mother-in-law and father-in-law “Mom” and “Dad,” but I feel weird because while we were dating, they always had me call them by their first names.

It upset my wife when I told her I was kind of weirded out by calling them Mom and Dad, since that’s what I call my parents, and as much as I like my in-laws, they’re not my parents.

Oddly enough, I have no problem calling my wife’s grandmother “Gran” like my wife and her family do, but with her parent’s it’s a different story.

Is there anything wrong with my continuing to call them by their first names? --- NEW SON-IN-LAW

DEAR NEW SON-IN-LAW: You need to not only share your reservations with your wife, but also bring them up to your new in-laws. They might be fine with you continuing to call them by their given names, or perhaps some other parental nomenclature could be settled on if they’re not.

Once you and your in-laws clear the air, it should set your wife’s mind at ease as well.

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