Ask Someone Else's Mom by Susan Writer

New Dad Tires of Always Getting Dragged to Pediatrician Visits

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: I know it’s important to my wife that I be an involved dad, and I really am trying to be, but I’m having a hard time making it to all the appointments scheduled with the pediatrician, like I was able to do with the obstetrician while my wife was expecting. It seems like most of those appointments were in the evening, but the pediatrician ones always seem to be between 9 and 5, the hours I work. Plus, I have nearly an hour commute each way, so my PTO is getting chewed into, and we can’t afford for me to take unpaid time right now since I’m the only one making money.

Does begging off going to every doctor’s appointment mean I’m not an involved dad? --- CONFUSED NEW DAD

DEAR CONFUSED NEW DAD: Unless there are unusual concerns with your new baby that might require special attention or medical care beyond well-baby check-ups, then being at every appointment is not more important than keeping the bills paid.

Tell your wife that if all’s well with your baby, then you have confidence in her handling the routine doctor’s visits. It may be that she needs to know she’s doing just fine in managing your growing family. Sometimes a little self-confidence goes a long way.

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