Ask Natalie

Ex Lashing Out on Facebook

DEAR NATALIE: My boyfriend of four years and I just broke up last week. It was a rough breakup, but I was so unhappy I needed to get out of the relationship. Since then, he has been posting nasty messages about me all over Facebook and private messaging me that he has less-than-flattering photos of me that he wants to share. I am so angry with him for stooping so low, but I don't know what to do to stop him. We broke up because of his controlling behavior, and I'm scared to confront him. What should I do? -- FACEBOOK MADNESS

DEAR FACEBOOK MADNESS: This isn't just a bad breakup, this is full on harassment. While the rules are still sketchy about what is actually considered online harassment, I would start taking screenshots of everything that he is doing and contact the police to file a report. Most likely they won't do anything unless he physically harms you (how messed up is that?), but at least you can have something on record. Also, block him from all your social media platforms and contact Facebook to let it know that someone is harassing you. It is usually pretty good about blocking people and looking into accounts that qualify as cyberbullying, which this clearly does. In the meantime, lay off the social media yourself, get out and enjoy your life and be grateful that you didn't waste a moment more with this jerk. 

Natalie's Networking Tip of the Week: Set the bar high -- but not too high -- when you are at a networking event. Managing expectations as to what you want to accomplish when you are out mingling will make you feel energized and excited to network and not feel as though you set yourself up to fail, which can inhibit your abilities to connect in the future. 

Please send your relationship and lifestyle questions to nbencivenga@post-gazette.com or tweet them to @NBSeen. You can also send postal letters to Natalie Bencivenga, 358 North Shore Drive, Pittsburgh, PA 15212

(This column was originally published by the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette.)

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