Ask Natalie by Natalie Bencivenga

Widower Considers Dating Scene

DEAR NATALIE: I'm 65 and have a lot of living in my rearview mirror, but I still want to share the journey ahead. I lost my life partner awhile back, but in her amazing love and understanding nature, she made me promise not to go it alone.

Here is the rub: How do I find someone to share the journey ahead, like I promised, and not make poor choices in how to find that person? I was blessed by good friends who set me up with my bride, but that doesn't seem likely to be my path forward.

I have multiple cultural tickets that I would love to share with someone, and so what would you suggest? -- MOVING FORWARD

DEAR MOVING FORWARD: Life transitions can be quite a challenge, and you have handled the passing of your beloved with grace, love and a touch of humor. I applaud you for wanting to continue the journey and recognize that moving forward doesn't mean you forget or negate the past.

Having said that, it can be quite a challenge to date in the modern landscape, but here are a few recommendations. First, try a matchmaking service (but a low-key one!). You sign up for the service that tailors a group to match your interests and personality. You meet other people who are all there for the same reason, and who knows what can happen?

Another option is to join a few organizations or volunteer groups. This is a great way to meet people with similar interests, and it also shows that they think about people outside of themselves, which is a wonderful quality to have in any partner.

Third could be online dating. There are sites out there for the 50-plus crowd. But then again, with your positive energy and openness, you may end up reaching for the same bag of apples in the grocery store and end up falling in love the old fashioned way ... just by a random moment in time!

Stay upbeat, get out and socialize!

Please send your relationship and lifestyle questions to or tweet them to @NBSeen. You can also send postal letters to Natalie Bencivenga, 358 North Shore Drive, Pittsburgh, PA 15212

(This column was originally published by the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette.)