DEAR MISS MANNERS: A 30-year friendship with my neighbor was threatened when he sent my wife an overt text message expressing his feelings for her. She was flabbergasted, and responded by simply stating, “I love my husband.” He then texted back “I’m sorry.”
Now a week has passed, and he has not apologized to either of us in person or provided any explanation.
I reached out and asked him for a private conversation, where I asked if everything was OK, as this seemed very out of character. I said I was hurt but that our friendship was salvageable, and suggested he have a conversation with my wife. Maybe even apologize.
The apology never came, nor has any acknowledgment of our existence; since that day, we just uncomfortably pass each other on our respective driveways. Not sure what else we can do.
GENTLE READER: Nothing! You are seeking an apology from a man who already gave one, and an explanation from a man who has none. Or at least no reasonable one.
Miss Manners recommends you let him be mortified and move along in peace. Yes, he made a terrible mistake. But had you not badgered him for another apology, and an explanation that could only make the situation worse, you might have had a hope of getting past it. Now it seems highly unlikely.