DEAR HARRIETTE: I was out having lunch with my family at an outdoor cafe when a guy I dated once more than 20 years ago rode his bike up and said hello. We chatted for a moment and my family said hello, but I didn’t even remember his name so I didn’t introduce him. Before he left, he told my husband that he had almost become my husband. What a joke! To my recollection, I went out with him once and maybe talked on the phone with him a few times. How he fixed it in his mind that we were about to walk down the aisle is a mystery to me. It did rattle my husband a little, especially since I had never mentioned this guy before. How can I make my husband know this is nothing, and what should I do if I ever run into this guy again? -- Confused, Dallas
DEAR CONFUSED: For your husband, be upfront about this guy. You barely remember him. You did not recall his name. You remember going out with him only once. You are surprised that he is so fixated on you. Be open and honest. Tell him you can’t think of any reason why this guy would be under the impression that you and he were even a couple, let alone getting married.
For the guy, if you ever encounter him again, ask him why he thinks you were going to get married. Listen to what he says. Respond to him honestly -- namely what you do and do not remember. Conclude by letting him know that you are sorry if there was ever any confusion, but you never intended to marry him, you are happily married and you would appreciate it if he would back off.
(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)