DEAR READERS: Today marks the anniversary of independence for our great nation. At a time when the freedom of so many of our citizens is being questioned, compromised and otherwise made less stable, it is essential for us to think about who we are. Without question, there are flaws in this great experiment in democracy. And yet, when I travel to different parts of the world, I see beauty all around while valuing my own country that much more.
When bad things happen stateside, many people stop to think about what they can or should do to make a difference. During certain political elections, depending on which side a person is on, there's plenty of talk about defecting to another country. Guess what? This isn't new. Going back as far as Marcus Garvey, there have been leaders who attempted to liberate Americans in bondage. Even then, the better choice turned out to be fighting on this soil for equal rights -- or so many believe.
Today, our country is in the midst of waging war all around the world in order to preserve our freedom here. Yes, there are people who fall on both sides of this debate over whether we should have boots on the ground in different regions of the world. A bigger discussion, though, is happening on our own soil.
A scab has been pulled off a very old wound, one that was created back when our country was founded. I see, through my own experience as well as through many years of studying racism and the insidious nature of how it plays out in everyday life, that our country must tackle it head-on so we can move past our unhealed sores.
Too many tragic events have occurred in the past year alone that point to the need for a national discussion about what Rodney King infamously asked: "Why can't we all just get along?" Interestingly, I believe the reason it is so hard for people of all backgrounds, genders, sexual orientations, races and economic status to cohabitate peacefully has everything to do with the capitalistic desire to want what we want when we want it, no matter what.
What happens when you feel contracted because there is something you want and believe you deserve, but you cannot have? And worse, when someone from a different group than you has that very thing?
In the simplest of descriptions, this is what happened to Dylann Roof, the young man who had been baptized into white supremacist thinking, who traveled to an historic African-American church in Charleston, South Carolina, and who murdered eight parishioners plus the pastor. His thinking got tangled in a web of rhetoric.
How often does this happen? Dare I say "too often"? Racism trumps most of the other "-isms" in terms of its breadth and depth, yet the reality is that discrimination of any kind erodes the very foundation of our country and its culture.
On this day of independence, I challenge us all to consider new ways of considering each other, starting with making the choice to accept those before us for who they are, without judgment. What happens then? From that vantage, we create the chance to redefine our truth. We make space to recognize and welcome the humanity in each and every one of us, even when we do not understand who is facing us.
(Lifestylist and author Harriette Cole is president and creative director of Harriette Cole Media. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Universal Uclick, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)