DEAR HARRIETTE: I adore my daughter's boyfriend. He is a year older than my daughter, and he is polite, smart and funny. My daughter is going to college hours away while he is at New York University. He plans on transferring out of state, and it upsets me because I always enjoy spending time with him, and I will miss him so much. I want him to stay at NYU so at least he and I could see each other when my daughter is away. My daughter finds this "creepy," but I do not want to see both of them leave me. What should I do? -- Empty Nest Times Two, Bronxville, New York
DEAR EMPTY NEST TIMES TWO: I hate to say this, but your daughter is right. Yes, it can be devastating to have your child leave home to go away to college, even as you knew it was going to happen one day. It is also lovely that you have such a positive relationship with her boyfriend. That said, it is inappropriate for you to attempt to keep either of them nearby. Now is the time for them to spread their wings and build their lives as young adults. You should do nothing to stand in their way. Your job is to support your daughter as she pursues her education. You should be available to talk to her as she works through whatever challenges come her way. If she and her boyfriend like that you stay in touch with him, you can do so -- to a certain extent. You must remember that he is not your child. And who knows if the two of them will stay together. They are young. Let them figure out their long-distance relationship without having a pseudo mother-in-law in the mix complicating matters.