DEAR HARRIETTE: My friend is dating someone I dated casually a few years ago. It's perfectly OK with me, but she says that she wants us all to be friends, and even possibly double-date. If we do double-date, what is the best course of action to make sure it isn't awkward? Do I joke around about any past issues, or just pretend they never happened? -- Retread, Cincinnati
DEAR RETREAD: What's most important is for you to let your friend know that you previously dated this guy so that it doesn't come as a surprise to her. You say that it was casual dating, but then you mention "past issues." You have to decide your level of comfort as it relates to becoming friendly with him again. Just because your friend wants you to double-date does mean that you must do so.
If you want to give it a try, go out as a group and pledge to stay in the moment. There should be no reason for you to bring up old memories. Joking around about issues from your dating history is an unnecessary action that will only lead to discomfort for everyone. The issue is not that you would be pretending something never happened. It would be living in the past. Instead, live fully in the here and now.