DEAR HARRIETTE: My husband and I took our 10-year-old son to sleepaway camp for the first time, and it was difficult to let him go. We have never been away from him for more than a night when he has gone for a sleepover at a friend's house down the street. Now he is going to be away for two weeks. He is thrilled, as he should be. We know that he will be OK, but we will miss him terribly.
The problem, though, is us. We've done hardly anything together since our son was born. We used to go on dates and enjoy our marriage. That seems to have died long ago. I worry about how we are going to spend our time together. In the past, when we weren't working, we could have fun together. The thing is, we don't have fun these days -- these years, in fact. We bicker a lot. How can we turn a squabbling time into something fun for us as a couple? -- Boringly Married, Cambridge, Massachusetts
DEAR BORINGLY MARRIED: Could you possibly be ready for what some call the "Come to Jesus" meeting, when you lay your cards on the table and talk about your marriage? If you bicker all the time and can't imagine life with your husband without your child, chances are you will end up either without each other or miserable when the time comes that your son moves away.
If you have the courage, go for it and figure out how to have a heartfelt conversation with your husband about your life. Rather than threatening him, consider staging an activity that you both will enjoy. Think about your shared interests and plan a fun date. Before that date ends -- and when you are sober -- tell your husband that you want to refresh your relationship. Tell him you love him and want to figure out where your happiness lies today.