DEAR HARRIETTE: My 19-year-old granddaughter recently moved out of her parents' home. They came home one day, and she had left. They quickly changed the garage door combination, took her off of their health insurance, required her to make payments on a vehicle that was given to her for her 18th birthday and her high school graduation and made her pay her auto insurance and her cellphone bill. The one thing that concerned me was her being removed from the health insurance because doing this saved them no money. In the past year, she had become close to a married couple from her church. This seemed OK to her parents until she moved in with them. This 19-year-old is not doing anything bad. She is in her first year of college, and since moving out, she has gone to work almost full time. Because I am still in contact with her, they no longer have anything to do with me. I cannot find anyone who can imagine a mother doing this to her child. My son-in-law is going along with whatever my daughter says to do. -- Concerned Grandmother, Dallas
DEAR CONCERNED GRANDMOTHER: Talk to your granddaughter and try to find out what happened that precipitated her moving out unexpectedly. Something happened that deeply upset her parents to the point that they washed their hands of responsibility for her.
If her parents refuse to talk to her right now, you should certainly stay close to her to ensure that she keeps clear and focused about her life. Your role can be to support her during this uncomfortable period. Over time, her parents may come back around. Until then, remain the bridge.