DEAR MISS MANNERS: The private golf club where I work requires that associates address members as Mr./Mrs./Ms./Dr. Surname. Quite often, the member will ask me to call him or her by their given name.
How do I respond professionally without falling back on "It is a job requirement"?
GENTLE READER: The sad part is that those who put you in this embarrassing predicament believe that they are flattering you. But what they are really doing is flattering themselves -- partly that they are being egalitarian, and mostly that they are too young to be addressed formally.
The easiest response is simply to say, "It's against the club rules." But if you don't want to do that, Miss Manners suggests saying politely, "If we meet socially, of course, but not on the job."
This is a quiet way of exposing the fake egalitarianism, because the member is unlikely to ask you to the bar for a drink after your shift. For good measure, you might add "sir" or "madam" to the statement.