DEAR MISS MANNERS: My daughter, a recent college graduate, has received invitations to several wedding showers in one month alone -- all of them including the phrase "share our joy!"
They are from all people she does not know well, and she is sending polite regrets.
These showers are attended by 100-plus people, most of whom are not invited to the wedding. Apparently this is their only opportunity to share the happy couple's joy. I really want to know what Miss Manners thinks.
GENTLE READER: The hosts probably don't. Miss Manners thinks it rude to invite people to a shower in connection with a wedding to which they will not be invited.
This adds to her suspicion about invitations to "share our joy." The joy that these couples are offering to inspire in those on their catch-all guest list seems to be the joy of giving, while they propose to have the joy of getting. Your daughter is wise to decline.
(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Universal Uclick, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)