01/20/2009DEAR ABBY: My daughter and future son-in-law are being married this summer. They are both vegans, and are planning a vegan dinner for their reception. I thought it was a very cool way of showing what different types of vegan dishes could be planned, but I'm getting grief from my husband. He thinks it is "selfish" of them not to offer a meat dish. I couldn't disagree more.
I told him I think they are right, but that I'd write to you and ask your opinion. It will have no effect on their reception, but I'd like to quiet things down on the home front. -- FUTURE MOTHER-IN-LAW
DEAR FUTURE M-I-L: This will be your daughter's day, not your husband's. I'm sure the food they offer will be not only delicious, but also sufficient to satisfy the guests, who may not even realize they aren't being offered meat.
If your husband is concerned about what will be served, he should eat before going to the wedding. Please tell him I said so, and let him chew on that.
DEAR ABBY: I am 15 and really like three boys. I enjoy being with each of them because they are all great guys. The problem is, each one believes that I like just him and has no idea about the others. I don't want to break any of their hearts because they have all told me they like me.
I also don't want to be thought of as a player or anyone saying I'm using them because I really do have feelings for each of them. Any advice? -- LOVES BOYS IN UTAH
DEAR LOVES BOYS: Where did each of those boys get the impression that you liked "only him"? My advice is to set the record straight now, before you DO get a reputation. Just say, "I think you're great, but I'm not ready for an exclusive relationship with anyone right now." It may not be music to their ears, but it's honest.
DEAR ABBY: I will graduate from college in June, and I plan to move back in with my parents. I have a steady job and can afford an apartment if I want, but I'd rather live with my parents because we have always had a close relationship. When I told a few friends my plans, they laughed at me.
Abby, I love my parents and have no problem living with them instead of living alone. What do I say to the "friends" who think I'm silly and stupid? -- DADDY'S LITTLE GIRL IN WISCONSIN
DEAR DADDY'S LITTLE GIRL: Had you signed your letter with any other name than the one you did, I'd have advised you to tell your friends to mind their own business.
However, because this is the way you identified yourself, allow me to comment. Have you discussed your plans with your parents, and will they welcome you living with them indefinitely? Because you are an adult and self-supporting, will you be contributing financially to the household? Will you have a curfew?
An important part of growing up is leaving the nest and flying solo for a while. My concern is that by living at home and clinging to the role of "Daddy's Little Girl," you won't be able to fully mature as an individual.
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