DEAR ABBY: I want to let go of all past hurts, disappointments and bad things that have happened. I want them gone from my life. I don't want to walk around angry and bitter all the time, but I am taken all the way back to the original feelings when they are triggered. I want to truly forgive, whether it's myself, others or even God. Any tips would be greatly appreciated. -- TRYING TO LET IT GO
DEAR TRYING: If you're asking me for amnesia, I can't provide it. What you're experiencing is normal, as long as you don't spend the majority of your time reflecting on past hurts and anger.
When you catch yourself dwelling on long-gone painful incidents, do not waste your happier present by allowing them to take up any more space in your here and now. Take a deep breath, release it, then tell yourself out loud, "That was then. This is now!" Then move from that location and concentrate on a different subject.
I know it can be done, because I have done it. And if I can do it, anyone can.