DEAR ABBY: My husband and I have been into swinging for 20 years. Everything has always been "no strings attached." I was with one man several times before he married his current wife. She's very religious, not into swinging and doesn't know he is.
I'm so attracted to "Nick" that I dream about him and have met him outside our marriages. I know it's wrong, but I can't keep him out of my mind. My husband doesn't know, and I know it would hurt him deeply. Should I tell Nick, or quit writing him on our swinging site? -- DESPAIR DOWN SOUTH
DEAR DESPAIR: And what have you to gain by revealing your feelings? If you think it would make Nick leave his wife, forget it. Because you know it would hurt your husband -- although I'm having trouble understanding why, because you're swingers -- I recommend you refrain from causing him pain.