DEAR ABBY: How do you discourage someone's friendliness without being rude?
An elderly man recently moved in with his family in our neighborhood. He roams the neighborhood and approaches anyone he sees to introduce himself and start a conversation. He doesn't seem to have dementia, as he knows where and who he is, but his behavior is a little odd (such as asking for the precise spelling of everyone's first name).
Unfortunately, now that he has met my husband and me, he comes up and knocks on the door to chat -- weekdays, evenings, weekends. The last time I was outside with my three kids, he approached with a stack of photos and proceeded to show me at least 100 prints of a trip he had taken abroad -- 10 years ago.
I feel trapped because I don't want to be mean to an old man, but I dread seeing him stroll down the road. What is the best way to deal with this situation? -- WANTING TO WITHDRAW
DEAR WANTING: The poor man is probably lonely and looking for human contact. Because you are not prepared to engage in his "neighborly" conversations, the next time he strolls by, tell him that you do not have time to chat right now. If he knocks on your door, tell him that you are busy or that you will be leaving shortly. And suggest to him that he may want to find a senior center so that he can make friends with contemporaries and won't feel so isolated.