DEAR ABBY: A few years ago, my husband and I decided that when our nieces and nephews turned 18 we would stop giving Christmas gifts. That decision has worked out fine -- until my husband's nieces and nephews began turning 18. Now it has become an issue with his side of the family, particularly his mother. She has made it clear through emails that we "have" to buy them gifts.
I don't know what to do. I don't want to start a war over gift-giving, but on the other hand, if we buy for his family, we have to buy for mine. We don't have a lot of disposable income. Please help us find a way to get through this. -- GRINCHED IN LAS VEGAS
DEAR GRINCHED: Emails are a wonderful form of communication, but when it comes to a discussion that involves emotion, it's time to use the old-fashioned telephone. You and your husband must call his mother and explain that buying gifts for the nieces and nephews on both sides of the family has become too much for you, which is why you have drawn the line at age 18. The "kids" are old enough to understand the gifts don't come from Santa. And so, for that matter, is your mother-in-law. Shame on her for pressuring you.