DEAR ABBY: I'm a widow who never thought I'd consider marrying again until I met "Lester" online two years ago. Being with him makes me feel like a teenager. He holds my hand when we go for walks, brings me flowers and is a wonderful lover.
My problem is he's taking care of his sister, "Gerda," who has cancer. He said she doesn't want him seeing anyone until she's dead. (He stands to inherit her fortune and doesn't want to take a chance on losing the money.) I told him we don't need the money, but he says he has put up with her bad moods for too long to lose it now.
My friends insist that because Lester doesn't call or email me much, Gerda is his wife, not his sister. I checked him out. Their last names are different and the house and his truck are in both their names. I'm lonely and want to be with him. I offered to help him with his sister, but he says she's also an alcoholic and doesn't want company.
I haven't heard from Lester since Gerda told him he can't have a girlfriend until she's gone. It's been two months. Should I wait, or should I start looking elsewhere as my son suggested? -- LONELY WITHOUT HIM
DEAR LONELY: Listen to your son because it appears he has good common sense. As to Lester, don't count on him because whatever Gerda is to him, it appears she has rallied and may not be going anywhere for a long, long time.
P.S. Married couples these days do not always share the same last name.