DEAR ABBY: I am in my 80s, and in fairly good health. I still drive a car, do my own cooking, baking, vacuuming, etc.
My wife has been in a nursing home for more than four years with Alzheimer's. She is well cared for. They feed her, dress and bathe her, and do everything necessary to keep her comfortable. I visit her twice a day.
When I meet people, or they call me on the telephone, the first thing they ask me is, "How is your wife doing?" I appreciate their concern about her, but nobody ever asks, "How are you doing?" "How are you getting along?"
I'm not looking for sympathy, Abby, but on the other hand, sometimes I could use a kind word or an invitation. – LONESOME IN SEAL BEACH, CALIF.
DEAR LONESOME: Yours is a common problem and you have my sympathy regardless. People do not mean to be insensitive, they simply haven't experienced what you're going through and don't understand how emotionally isolated you are.
The Alzheimer's Association gives referrals to family support groups nationwide. The toll-free phone number is 1-800-272-3900. Please don't wait to call them. Trust me; you'll be glad you did.